摘要:西德尼·卡尔顿对露西的爱情是深厚而崇高的,这份爱情的博大和无私在于,西德尼为露西的幸福牺牲了宝贵的生命。只要爱人幸福的活在这个世界上,自己就可以了无牵挂。西德尼正是怀着这样简单而满足的愿望,没有难过和忧伤的观望露西的幸福,他知道露西不会让自己失望。西德尼有着高尚的人格,这份爱情也有着我们难以想象的伟大。
《双城记》是狄更斯一部成熟的现实主义作品,它是一部波澜壮阔的历史,它一个感人肺腑的故事,它是一种纯洁而高尚的爱。全书充溢着扑朔迷离的色彩,映照了当时的时代气息。作者用一连串引人入胜的故事作为杠架,细致地描写了法国大革命的前因后果,成就和错误,而主人公西德尼·卡尔顿、露西·曼内特和查尔斯·达尔内之间的真挚的情感成为一大亮点。
在《双城记》中,我最喜欢的,也是令我最为感动的人是律师助手西德尼·卡尔顿。他是一个才华出众的律师,表面却上懒散放纵。甘心情愿躲在人后,做别人成功的垫脚石。他妥协于周围环境,但有时却显得格格不入。他仿佛亲手筑起了一堵墙,隔绝了自己与名、与利、与社会,默默地逗留在角落里。
西德尼·卡尔顿对露西·曼内特深沉的爱是催人泪下的,他崇高的人格是撼人心魄的。他这种崇高的情感是我们难以想象的,他最终得到了心灵的平静,作了祭坛上的牺牲,带着最美的情感告别了所爱的人,但他会在爱人的心中得到永生。
他一出场就与众不同。带着一身忧郁,隐去了光芒。总是灰心、失望、冷漠、凄凉。在老贝勒满法庭,虽然他为达尔内的被释立了头功。事后他保持局外人的身份并不参加对达尔内的祝贺。等到别人都走了,他才向达尔内建议“‘Why don’t you call a health’‘why don’t you give your toast?’”“‘Miss Manette’”①此时他已爱上了曼内特小姐。此后,当他否认自己曾经注意过露西时,一种忧伤的情绪笼罩着他。正是因为他太小看自己,似乎有点自卑,因此他放任了自己,又因为放任而感到绝望。他是个很有才华,感情深厚的人,却无法用才华和情感为自己获得幸福。
他爱上了露西,却不愿去追求。整整一年时间,他始终作为一个沮丧的忧伤的闲人出现在露西家。“‘If it had been possible,Miss Manette,that you could have returned the love of the man you see before youself--flung away,wasted,drunken,poor creature of misuse as you know him to be—he would have been conscious this day and hour,inspite of his happiness,that he would bring you misery,bring you to sorrow and repentance,blight you,disgrace you,pull you down with him.I know very well that you can have no tenderness for me,I ask for none,I am even thankful that it cannot be.’”他内心的善良使他担忧。自己难免使她痛苦,悲哀和侮辱,拖着她一起堕落。于是他把爱情隐藏在心里,宁可痛苦地徘徊在午夜的街口,压抑着心中热烈的感情与无尽的思念。②他的心如同苍凉的落日,有着绝望的暖色光辉,可是却将沉入永远的黑夜。当他终于鼓起勇气向露西表达爱情的时候,如果他能再多给自己一点儿信心,或许他的命运就会有所改变,这个悲剧也不会如此伤人。
露西和西德尼·卡尔顿之间带有一种使人感到揪心的凄楚的气氛。他知道即使他对她的爱得到了报答,也只会增添他的痛苦和悲愁,因为他感到这种报答无力把他从吞没了他的自私和情欲的泥沼中搭救出来。但他又无法克制自己,而终于悲伤地向她表白了自己的爱情。“‘I wish you to know that you have been the last dream of my soul. In my degradation I have not been so degraded but that the sight of you with your father, and of this home made such a home by you, has stirred old shadows that I thought had died out of me. Since I knew you, I have been troubled by a remorse that I thought would never reproach me again, and have heard whispers from old voices impelling me upward, that I thought were silent for ever. I have had unformed ideas of striving afresh, beginning anew, shaking off sloth and sensuality, and fighting out the abandoned fight. A dream, all a dream, that ends in nothing, and leaves the sleeper where he lay down, but I wish you to know that you inspired it.’”这段感人置深的告白是他对自己的爱人第一次袒露心声,也是最后的一次。他留下了悲痛和惋惜,只希望自己的这番知心话可以可以保存在爱人的心中,这就足够了。这份爱隐藏在内心,但却无比的深厚;它默默地承受与煎熬,为的是使它维系的人幸福。③他希望露西幸福,对自己却没有任何要求。他带着诚挚的祝福,愿露西和达内尔有美好的生活,因为他相信,爱比恨更为强有力的多。
西德尼还对露西说过“‘For you, and for any dear to you, I would do anything. If my career were of that better kind that there was any opportunity or capacity of sacrifice in it, I would embrace any sacrifice for you and for those dear to you. ’”他也确实做到了这一点。当达内尔再次被捕并被宣判死刑后,西德尼以一种及其惨烈的方式实现了自己的诺言。他挺身而出,作了周密的、巧妙的安排,为露西换出了达尔内,用自己的生命抵挡了一种无人可以抵挡的横暴的力量,完成了撼人心魄的壮举。
在监狱中西德尼即将换出达内尔时,他让达内尔写给露西“‘If you remenber…… the words that passed between us, long ago,you will readily comprehend this when you see it.You do remember them,I know.It is not in your nature to forget them.’”我看到这一段时,不禁热泪盈眶。这是一种多么深厚的爱情啊!西德尼相信,露西会记得他的告白,他们之间的约定。哪怕牺牲自己的生命,他也毫无怨言。
在故事的最后,西德尼步入刑场的时候,他平静的像什么都不会发生似的。他只是会到另一个世界去,而并不是死亡。他像是在讲述将来的故事。“‘I see that I hold a sanctuary in their hearts, and in the hearts of their descendants, generations hence. I see her, an old woman, weeping for me on the anniversary of this day. I see her and her husband, …… and I know that each was not more honoured and held sacred in the other’s soul, than I was in the souls of both.’”“‘I see that child who lay upon her bosom and who bore my name, a man winning his way up in that path of life which once was mine. ……I see him bringing a boy of my name, with a forehead that I know and golden hair, to this place--then fair to look upon, with not a trace of this day’s disfigurement--and I hear him tell the child my story, with a tender and a faltering voice.” 我可以感受到他那一种超脱世俗的最纯洁、最崇高的爱。爱一个人,爱到会以她的幸福为己任,爱到可以为她牺牲一切,甚至是自己最宝贵的生命。这种感情,还有谁会不为之动容呢?
全书的结尾也是我很喜欢的,是西德尼的最后一句话。“‘It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.’”他用他的生命换来了一个“大团圆”的结局,他将带着人们的怀念,获得永生。
很多时候,一个人都是要放弃很多东西的,因为必定有另外一样东西值得我们去放弃一些什么。比如,想要保护的人,想要完成的事情,等待实现的梦想。在《双城记》中,我能感受到西德尼·卡尔顿的爱情。那种超脱世俗的爱情,已经升华到一个新的境界。西德尼·卡尔顿相信,自己的离去可以让所有人都快乐的在一起。他在安静中听到幸福驶过的声音,有他的灵魂的陪伴,爱人永远都不会寒冷。他用他的一切向黑暗的世界挑战,他得到的是真正的光明,以及一种常人难以理解的为爱牺牲的甜蜜。
爱情过处,温暖如春。
参考文献:
①本文中有关《双城记》的引文均引自中国大百科全书出版社2001年9月出版的《双城记(英汉对照本)》。
②纯洁的爱——读《双城记》有感(http://www.cycnet.com/cms/2004/moral/zhuanti/chunjiedeai/t20040518_3740.htm)
③最崇高的爱——《双城记》读后感(http://old.yangzheng.com.cn/changlang/guangchang/main1.htm) 转贴于 中国论文下载中心 http://paper.studa.com